3 Practical Self-Care Techniques | Yoga 15

Abi Carver
4 min readApr 2, 2020

The topic of self-care makes me a little uncomfortable, but I just listened to an interview with self-compassion researcher, Kristen Neff, on The One You Feed podcast, that helped me to frame it more positively.

Kristen defines effective self-compassion as: “Treating yourself with the same kindness, support and care that you would show to a close friend.”

She breaks it down into three parts:

  1. First, you have to acknowledge that you’re suffering-instead of avoiding, resisting or being swallowed up by the pain.
  2. Second, you take care of yourself as you would a close friend.
  3. And third, you recognise that you are not alone, that suffering is part of the human condition and that, whatever you are going through, is not a personal failing.

When I have experienced acute suffering in the past, I let it swallow me up. I aggressively pursued destructive habits. And I felt very alone. Boy, was I doing it wrong!

The third part of Kristen’s self-care model struck me most powerfully. When we suffer, we’re acting under the illusion that life is supposed to be perfect and that we’re the only one suffering. Realising that pain is an inevitable part of the human condition helps us to feel less isolated and to take a broader perspective.

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Abi Carver

Creator of YOGA 15, Yoga for Athletic Performance and Recovery.